1.57-59 The Several Kinds of Self-love

Section 1.57. Of Natural Self-love.

The Several Kinds of Self-love

Objection. Lovers of themselves are condemned in God's word, as 2 Tim 3:2; Phil 2:21; 1 Cor 10:24 and Rom 15:1.

Answer. There is a double loving of a man's self.

One good and commendable:

The other evil, and damnable.

Good and commendable loving of a man's self is 1. Natural, 2. Spiritual.

That which is natural is in all by the very instinct of nature: and it was at first created, and still is by God's providence preserved in our nature, and that for the preservation of nature. Were there not such a natural love of himself in every one, man would be as careless of himself, as of others, and as loath to take pains for himself, as for others. Wherefore that every one might have care at least of one, even of himself, and so the world be better preserved, God has reserved in man this natural affection, notwithstanding his corruption by sin. Yea further because every one is not able to look to himself, at least when he is young, sick, old, or any other way impotent, God by his wise providence has extended this natural affection towards others also as they are nearly linked unto us by the bonds of nature. The next to a man's self are (by blood and bond of nature) children. Admirably much is that which parents do for their children, which they would never do, if there were not a natural affection in them to their children. From children again this affection arises towards their parents, that when parents grow old, impotent, or any way unable to help themselves, they might have succor from their children. And because parents and children are not always together, or not able to help one another, or unnatural, God has yet further extended this natural affection to brothers, cousins, and other kindred. And for a further extent thereof has instituted marriage between such as are not of the same blood, and by virtue of that bond raised a natural affection not only in husband and wife one to another, but also in all the alliance that is made thereby. Moreover this affection is wrought in neighbours, friends, fellows, and other by like bonds knit together, that the bow of God's providence might have many strings, and if one break, another might hold. In all these kinds, the nearer a man comes to himself, the more does this affection show itself, according to the proverb, Near is my coat, but nearer is my skin. God having wrought this natural affection in the several kinds thereof, and there being good ends and uses thereof, it is not to be condemned.

Section 1.58. Of Spiritual Self-love.

Spiritual self-love is that which is supernaturally wrought in man by God's Spirit: whereby he is both enlightened to discern what is most excellent, and best for him, and also moved to choose the same: so as this serves to rectify the former. Hence it comes to pass that their chiefest care is for their souls, and for the eternal salvation thereof: for the furthering whereof they can be content as need requires, to beat down their body, [1 Cor 9:27] to deny them sometimes their ordinary refreshing by food, rest, and other like means, [2 Cor 11:27] yea and to suffer them to be imprisoned, racked, and otherwise tortured, and life itself to be taken from them. [Heb 11:36] This men do, and suffer, not for want of natural affection, but by reason of spiritual affection which persuades them that it is good for them it should be so. A man is not therefore to be said not to love the health and safety of his body because he loves something more. For a covetous man though he love his money, yet he can be content to part with it for bread to nourish his body: so a spiritual man though he love his life, yet he can be content to lose it for his soul's salvation. For he loves himself sufficiently, who does his best to enjoy the chiefest and truest good. This spiritual affection extends itself as far as natural affection, namely to wives, husbands, children, parents, brothers, cousins, friends, etc. Much is this urged and pressed in the scriptures as Isa 55:1-3; Matt 6:19-20,33; John 6:27; 1 Tim 6:11,19.

Section 1.59. Of Evil Self-love.

The self-love which is evil swerves in the—

Object.

Measure.

1. In the Object, when it is cast upon our corruptions, our lusts, our evil humours: when we affect and love them, and for them pursue whatsoever may satisfy them: as the ambitious, lustful, riotous, gluttonous, and other like persons. This is expressly forbidden, Make not provision for the flesh to fulfill the lusts thereof. [Rom 13:14]

2. In the Measure, when our love is wholly and only cast upon ourselves, so seeking our own good, as we regard no man's good but our own: nor care what damage another receives, so we may get advantage thereby. This is also forbidden: for it is contrary to the property of true love, which seeketh not her own, [Phil 2:21; 1 Cor 13:5; 1 Cor 10:24] namely to the prejudice of another. This has the title of self-love appropriated to it. It sprang from the corruption of nature, and is daily increased by the instigation of Satan for the destruction of mankind. It manifests itself by the many tricks of deceit which most men use in their dealings with others: by making advantage of others' necessities as in the case of usury, of raising corn, and other commodities in time of scarcity, with the like: by men's backwardness to help such as stand in need of their succor: by want of compassion in other men's miseries: and by many other like unkindnesses: all which verify the proverb, Every man for himself.

But by distinguishing the forenamed points we may see that notwithstanding evil self-love be a most detestable vice, yet it is both lawful and commendable to love one's self aright.